Thursday, March 8, 2012

Keeping a different kind of balance

There is this eternal all encompassing balance that is kept in this world.  And we are completely out of control of it.  It exists regardless to us, and is kept because of us.  Every single step we take, every move we make, every breath we take: it won't be missing us because we can't escape it.  We don't even want to.  But even if we did, we wouldn't be aware of that want.  This balance is the cause of all calamity, all war, all disease, all suffering, and all happiness, peace, and moments by yourself next to a river watching little water skidders ski around in circles like Kim Yuna.  It is what you hate, and love, and don't care about.  

Remember that time when you were young and you heard the phrase "well that’s life" for the first time?  Come on, remember?  It was from your Cub Scout leader after someone had popped your plastic pool ball.  You felt like justice wasn’t served.  Like evil was accepted and adored.  Well, I tell you, you didn’t feel any of those things; you just felt the balance effect.

Remember the first time you couldn’t speak?  Come on, remember?  It was when your ex-girlfriend told you she might like someone else.  You even had your friend over for a little buffet party for two, but you had to leave the apartment and walk around to let the steam off.  You noticed the bathhouse right next to your house for the first time then and all you wanted was to go in and hope your steam would mix in with the hot water’s and dissipate from your life.  Once again, there wasn’t any malice there.  No sinister being behind the curtains tickling the cords of your heart.  Just the balance effect.

Remember the first time you didn’t know WHY you were?  Come on, remember?  It was when you knocked over your glass of water which in succession waterlogged your precious little belongings you had littered about your desk.  Stupidity stung you like a bee here because the night before you had the very thought that this could happen if you didn’t change something with the current layout of your life.  Of course now you know it was nothing more than the balance effect.

Everything that has its opposite (which is everything) is literally on this balance.  And this balance is never static.  Constant flux baby.  Sometimes it is weighed down with what you like, so you feel good, you thank all sorts of beings for this blessing, and you feel a sense of justification for the current path you are on.  But soon the side you like topples off causing a full-force swing in the opposite direction.  Then you feel non-good, you start reevaluating your current path, you look for something with a greater girth of forgiveness. 

But don’t you notice?  The WORLD is on this balance, so this balance is as much a part of you as you are apart of the sand of the sea.  Why do you enlist such emotions when it swings from side to side?  The balance doesn’t intend to hurt you, or please you.  It has no idea of you.  It has one job, and it does it methodically, relentlessly, undoubtedly.  Swing honey, swing.  There is nothing organic about it.  It is as cold and lifeless as the moon.  So why do you care?  Why do you get mad with the bad and sappy with the happy?  Getting angry when you are down is like yelling at your socks for being dirty.  Feeling joy when you are up is like thanking a pig for tasting good.  The more emotion you release when you are up, the harder you are going to feel the fall, because there is no play in ground without a swing. 

So I implore you to consider a different balance.  The kind you do have control of.  Your brain.  You can control what you let enter and exit it.  So the next time you want to bend over, redden in the face, foam at the mouth, and rabitically fume at your socks for their eggshell hue, justify it first with your brain.


  1. I like this one. It's true, times can't and won't always be 'good'; and even if they are 'good', then with no counter balance - something 'bad - we probably wont be able to recognize and appreciate the good things we have.

    With that said, i think these good/bad things are a human construct - a construct of the brain. For most things in the world, even organic ones, good and bad does not exist (it's not good nor bad for a rock to be on a mountain or in the ground. It's not good nor bad for a fish to be in one bit of water v.s. another bit of water. There is no expectation about what is 'better' for most things in the world). With people, we have to categorize what is good and what is bad, including emotions, and we often don't know why we put things in the categories we put them in; most people just do it based on what everyone else seems to think.

    Take for example sadness. Is it really 'bad'? Does it mean I'm not happy if I'm sad? And why is 'happiness' so good? so sought after?

    that kind of thinking makes me crazy! For me, i just wanna see the whole: life is full of lots of unpredictable and dramatic events for every person. I don't know what part is 'good' and what part is 'bad' but I know that life, as a whole - in it's entirety - is beautiful.

  2. But then, why is beauty sought after? why can't ugly? I agree that the words good and bad are human constructs because they are part of a language. The ideas behind them are what we as humans seek to understand. environments clearly dictate what is good and bad for everything on this earth, which is why some animals remain in certain parts of the world, and which is why I will never work at a big corporation. nothing is inherently bad or good, just bad or good for a certain something. That is where my brain explodes with curiousity. why? Why can't sharks survive in lakes? why can't I survive at Samsung? I mean, it all can be explained. I hate rigid environments. there isn't enough food to sustain a sharks diet in a lake. I feel uncomfortable in suits. Sharks need salt water to be able to swim correctly. BUT!!!! WHY is it THAT way. Why do I hate the stale methodical? Why do sharks need to eat so much. AND THEN once those questions are answered, there will undoubtedly be another set of 'WHYS' to answer. until insanity ensues. That is the origin of good and bad. But I feel if you look back far enough, there probably wasn't a difference. at one point there wasn't a good or bad, just a _______.

  3. These analogies are a bit confusing and a bit entertaining. But going with it, why would a shark ever care about where it is? Why do people torture themselves with with looking at everything they don't have? I think it's gotta be partially from pressure from society, partially from human nature; and if we don't take the time to seek a balance in ourselves, then it's going to detract from living.

    part of the balance you are talking about, i think, must be just looking around sometimes and saying 'this isn't what i would have guessed would happen, but looking at whats around me - at this moment - everything is perfect and nothing else should or needs to be'. Peace.

  4. here is a poem I wrote a few months ago. It might be totally unrelated to what u have written about here, but see what u think.

    What is kind?
    Does the kind hand push the grass,
    and tell it to be tall like a tree?
    Does an amiable one gaze upon the night
    and demand of it “Be bright!”

    Would a caring motion demand
    That a wolf share it's meal with a bee?
    Or would a desert sand be more kind,
    if it obligingly dispersed
    to give way for the sea?

    And if I look upon you, whom I do not understand
    Is it kind of me to show you, how I tend my land?
    Even when your garden looks brown, and bit withered to me,
    should I hope “Green! Let your garden be!”

    For those who wish to treat me merry
    I ask a bit
    Let me toil with my fruitless task
    Let me gaze with confusion,
    upon that I cannot see
    And though not the same colours, as the common rainbow
    My life will shine bright like a star: burning all that comes near
    My heart will be peaceful like a tundra: harsh, cold, and barren
    My passion will be exciting and mysterious: like the deep pressing sea
    And for all who gawk at my passing, let them say
    “What a weird sight to see!”